mood: sick - again
listen: johnny lang has one of the most..sexy husky growling vocals i've ever heard.
passions update: they dug up sheridan's body- she's alive, and ethan has chosen theresa over gwen. While Ivy's secret is sorta out there, i believe that evil bitch hotchkiss woman knows about it. And Kay is still bitchin' about charity and is now joing with the evil witch hectate. ooooh. and i'm still waiting for chad and whitney to get together :)

i have already taken tuesday off and now wednesday(today). Channel 7 programming has been totally dedicated to the events of sept.11th. I've watched one doco already, and tonite its like..all there is on tv. Ahh..i hate being sick! grr..ruins my whole week. And i havent been to a lingustics lecture for two weeks now..or a tutorial for three weeks. and i;ve missed three anthropology tutorials..i'm getting lazy again. bad evelyn *slaps hand* .
anyhoo,,must go. i'm starving, its 3:30 and i haven't eaten since 9:30 this morning. cya kids. be good. be safe.

mood: i hate moths - and I want(&need) cake
listen: dashboard confessional 'Screaming infidels'

ello - seen the new layout piccys at the site yet? www.geocities.com/evesygal
make sure ya'all sign my guestbook(s)! hehe..i am in a fairly good mood right now..unlike my mood earlier while supermarket shopping - which is becoming a permant hate of mine. Its evil. I only go supermarket shopping, cos i get to see bec, even if it is only for a brief five minutes while she is putting out the chickens, or when she's handing me chicken loaf over the counter.
Ahh..i miss seeing her and ther others from the bus. My new bus, stucks.
The people on it are funny, but not my crowd dude. I feel like i'm in year 7 again - like a virgin to public transport. Heidelberg buses suck ass. their ugly, and ugly. LIke ya know those buses with the seats that face the aisle..their bad, cos all u do is spend the trip trying to keep from sliding and falling off them. I like back seats, more comfortable, less people there. And i get a better view, and everytime the bus drives over a bump in the road, i feel it.
And all i want to eat at the moment is pie. I mean..meat pies, and chicken pies, and apple pies. Actually apple pies are starting to make me sick, i used to eat them all the time. I want more pies. But pies, though their probably from england, they should be classified as an aussie gourmet..just cos.

anyhoo..i must dash. that anthropology essay of mine won't write itself (i wish it would).
*MUAH*

eves.

www.mp3.com/Brandon_Wiard
I like his stuff.

www.mp3.com/stations/Evesy - My own station on mp3.com. It's on the Weezer artist page - yay for more hits. yay for more plays. YAY!

*MUAH*

I've been searching deep down in my soul / words that i'm hearing are starting to get old / feels like i'm starting all over again/ the last three years were just pretend/ and I said...Goodbye to you/ goodbye to everything i thought i knew / you were the one i loved/ the one thing that i tried to hold on to...

Woke up @ 7:30am. Started essay. finished @ 11:45am. left the house @ 1:30pm. what did i do in that 11:45-1:30 time period? Wouldn't you like to know! muahaha!

Missy E's 'one minute man' has to be one of my fave songs- ever. I can't stop listening to it. I'm listening to it right now. I remember one time someone asked me what she was singing - ha! If u can't guess from the title, which is a dead give away, i think u an idiot.
But if u download it, get da version wit Trina - its even better.

listen:
Olivia - bizounce
Saves the day - Firefly
Aztek trip - beautiful
Shades apart - Chasing after daydreams *I will catch your fall, and keep the world away. Catch a falling star..*
Sugarbomb - Hello




You're slick, sleek, and you waste no time when there's a mission to be taken care of. You do what you're told, even if it sometimes means risking your life. You care for others to such an extent that you'd do anything for the ones you love. Not only that, but you're stylish, original, agile, and passionate.





What's your claim to fame?

*If you sing..for the love you bring won't mean a thing unless you sing*

*muah* wit much luv and hugz..eves.

Mood: fustrated - I can't seem to write my damn essay!
listen: Vanessa Carlton 'Be not nobody' / Smashing Pumpkins 'Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness'/ The Cars

www.mp3.com/stations/Evesy

- my online mp3 station, its good. I also have a launch.com station - but that one was kinda crappy.

I don't have much to write. At the moment i have a serious case of writers block. And my only inspiration at the moment are old episodes of Absoutly Fabulous. classics though :)

well i must dash, i have an essay to start since i've wasted all day doing nothing already.
*muah*

"Wanted" - Vanessa Carlton

I have wandered far and wide
for something real something to die for
but I have found you and you do not see
all that is me all that is true

I am more than you will see,
I am more than you will need,
I am more than you will see,
more than wanted

as you float the flimsy surface
you should know life lies beneath it
don't pretend you feel what I feel for you
live illusion and i am real

[chorus]

I know, I know you like the way
you feel when I play
I know, I know you don't really
hear what I say
I know, I know you are waiting
for something to raid
I know, I know you wish you could be
more than you say

I have wandered far and wide
for something real something to die for
but I have found you and you do not see
all that is me all that is true and

[chorus]

more than you'll love, more than you'll hate,
more than you'll hold, more than wanted
more than you'll crave, more than you'll cherish,
more than you'll have, more than wanted

All I feel like doing is singing this song, because it holds so much passion..so much pain (not too sound corny). Its sung with such 'gusto'. And I would so love to sing this song to a certain person - not him. the other one. Because its almost how i feel. Well it explains it the best I think. It's funny how I try to avoid using his name on here. As if any of them would be reading this, but my close friends who read this know who I mean. But maybe I should give them different names, a nick name. How about asshole 1 and 2? nah..too much alike. I could name one 'Human Nature gay boy' and the other 'Horndog' but..maybe that's just too obvious. lol..i personally have nothing against these people. And I'm not afraid to bad mouth someone using their real name, eg. Blake for example. An example of that would be today Jon was saying he was wearing a skivvy or a turtle neck. Matt said that only girls wear turtle necks, to which i replied "Oh not all, Blake wears turtle necks...oh-wait.." (a direct refrence to blakes sexuality - which i argue is homosexual - and there is nothing wrong with that. It makes good television - see Queer as Folk).
If you have any nickname suggestions, please send them here: evesygal@kittymail.com

*MUAH*

74 minute r&b mix - OHHHH YEAH!

25th of August 2001, an entourage of 9 people boarded a small jet plane - They never were seen alive again. Aaliyah was one of them. So I'd like to take a moment to remember the souls of the nine who died in that fateful plane crash. And a moment to remember Aaliyah for who she was to the music industry and to her fans. And to her future, that almost was.

Well after that sad intro, hello everyone and how ya'all doing?!
Its been awhile...two weeks maybe? I haven't written anything forawhile, i've been busy reading. Lots of work due in the next few weeks, so i'll be knee deep in paper work..and i'll probably be really pissed off with a certain printer of mine that doesn;t seem to want to work.
And geocities is being a bitch. I have some nice new pictures i'd like to put up for the crappy make-shift layout i have. All aaliyah pictures of course.

I honestly don't have alot of say right now, mainly cos nothing has happened of late. Oh congrats to lisa getting her P's :)
Yea..and congrats to me..cos i've been on the freeway driving four times :) Yes..i'm young and dangerous in a car. Watch out pedestrians cos i'm driving now.

Today has been a stoopid day, i have been busy all day. And its a sunday. I did some work..some reading, didn't get to finish it though, i walked the dog..to the local video store of course. And i was forced to vac the car and wash it. grr. I have vaucume cleaners more than anything, i just want to smash the damn things when i see them. But the one at home i have bashed around a bit...i'm normally pissed off when forced to do housework. I hate it. i do i do i do. its a bitch.

anyhoo..i'm gonna finish off my e-mails. write late

listen:
James dean - daniel beddingfield
Make yourself - Incubus mtv unplugged version
Get free - the vines
My neck my back - Khia (dirty, dirty, dirty lyrics)
Sing - Travis

*muah*

time: 9.38am
about to go to anthropology.
i just joined the justincase e-team. they rock.

i need to waste 15 minutes, so i came on here. I was photocopying before. All that radiation can't be good for the eyes.
It was raining cats and dogs this morning, i got drenched. So did my hair. grr. I feel like sleeping..oh wait, i'm going to anthropology...i'll get my chance to catch up on some Z's.

listen: ministry of sound 2002 annual - is excellent. It'll have you dancing and grooving..and its damn good.
I actually made some very stupid spelling error befoer. I must be tired, i can hardly type this morning,.
its another late night for me today. I'll be at uni till around 6ish. then go home..

everyoned needs to check their tv guides. I heard that dark angel is starting this week. on thursday nite @ 9:30 i believe. YAY.
I'm thinking i will actually go to uni on thursday. i should go to the linguistics lecture since i missed yesterdays. and i probably missed out on some tutorial sheets too..so. i need those. I'm kinda hungry right now. Yesterday in cinema, in the screening of 'Manhunter' i was starving..and my tummy was blubbing away..it was saying 'feeed me..feeeeeeed me FEEED ME!' in a tiny meanicing voice. While this morning my hair was saying, 'Cut me..cut meee..CUT ME!'
I think i am in an extremely weird mood this morning. and i'm slowly falling asleep. which is bad! cos anthroplogy were supposed to be watching a video or sumthing...maybe i'll get the nearest person to slap me. that should do the trick.

thought for the day: bright pink nails aren't tacky looking are they?

time: 9:05 am
mood: amused
listen: only to the music playing inside my head

Slang words are quiet funny. Especially English slang. And i mean, from england.
See..i saw bend it like beckham last saturday..and they used this word to say that the blonde chick was pissed off. 'Strop' it was. So i scoured the net for this word, and its proper meaning. Strop - is a noun. It stands for bad mood, or fury. Stroppy, the adjective, is for bad temper. So you could say, 'You're in a strop with me' and a person could reply with, 'No i'm not in a strop with you!'
So next time u hear that word. You'll all know what it means. I hope i have enlightened you all. :)

At the moe i'm reading the script for american pie. Which actually was orginally called 'Great Falls'. I think that was supposed to be the name of the high school. The script is extremely funny.

time: 9.21 am
i'd better get my ass off to class. I need to do some readings before then. I'll write more later

*muah*
www.geocities.com/evesygal - go and sign my guestbook(s) NOW!

Time: 7:50am Monday morning
mood: Extremly tired
listening: colour blind by counting crows, and Oxygen by David Franj

i'm in a slow mood. Cos i only woke up 45 mins ago. But i can't sleep, because all my dreams are of Lord of the rings.
I have watched that movie, so many times now. And i'm not sick of it at all. And last night on sbs there was..a documentry on J.R.R Tolkien..so of course i had to watch that. It was interesting, considering most hippies in america took to his lord of the rings books like a fly to sticky syrup. I never thought his books were hippish, because there's no sex (in fact there are hardly any female charaters), and no drug use. I guess because middle earth is a reflection on society then.

I have a lingusticis assignement to do..grr. of course they assigned it on the day i decided not to turn up to. So i need to look up those slang words today. Im thinking i'll just watch episodes of dark angel and buffy. Ya know..dark angel has the whole slang thing..with the boo..and the talking about ur self..the whole original cindy thing. LOL.
i might do that now. And the osborne's are not on TV tonite..channel ten thought that its new drama series deserves a whole two hour time slot. And as apart of channel ten's niche demographic (16-36) I would rather watch ozzy osborne off his head and saying weird shit..instead of white collar blue. lol..great name for a show though.
So my monday night is ruined. I want alias & dark angel back. That mutant X show just doesn't do it for me. well...the guys in the show do it for me. LOL.

*nite nite*

GOODBYEEEEE...NICE TO KNOW YOUUUUUU!
I haven't felt the way I feel today
its so hard for me to specify
I'M begining to notice how much this feels like a waking limb
PINS AND NEEDLES
NICE TO KNOW YOU!
GOOOODBYEEEE..nice to know you..

hehe. Incubus kick ass. Go download the mtv unplugged vids...its good.

excuse me while i take 20 minutes to write an e-mail....

*TWENTY MINUTES LATER*

WHEN U HOLD MY HAND YOU HOLD MY HEART
BUT LATELY WE'VE BEEN DRIFTING APART
...i can't remember the rest of the words. hmm.

YOU CAN'T BE ME I'M A ROCKSTAR

I'm having trouble breathing, since you walked in.

We've been on the run driving in the sun looking out for number one..

Suddenly the sky is falling, could it be too late for me?

I don't want you to feel sorry for me - you never gave us a chance to be

I hate to love to love to hate you - but there's no end for me in sight

I am no solution to the sound of this pollution in me..

How long must you wait for it?

So would I be out of line If I said..I miss you.

*lots of lines from songs - recent songs of course. If u can guess them all..i will send you something cute. Its just to test how many ppl have actually read my blog..lol. But if no one bothers..well i guess there's my answer!*

Desperately

Theres something about the way you looked at me
made me think for a moment that maybe we were meant to be
Living lives seperately
and its strange cause things change but not me wanting you
so desperately

I cannot ignore it
I keep giving in but i should know better
but theres something about the way you looked at me
and its strange cause things change but not me wanting you
so desperately..

I'm in a singing mood tonight. .I feel like writing something, like grabbing a guitar and playing a few chords.
I've been reading the manga translations of sailormoon. Its better than the tv series..which fucked up the whole story. anyhoo. I don't have anything to write. I think i'm more comfortable writing the old fashioned way. Ya know..pen and paper. There's something more poetic when u put words to paper. Computers just making everything so fucking impersonal and formal.

I had my first driving lesson today. Lets just say, i need practise. But overall, it was a good effort. But damn, those lil indicators are tricky to use. But my first day driving was good. I had a great time :)

Here is parts of a song i wrote not that long ago:
{You}
Its been a long time since i saw your face
And after it all - i've told myself
I'm over you
But I lied and told half truths
the sight of you makes me weak with sadness
I don't know myself beacause of your face
you walked into that room
you proceeded past my presence
I am nothing - not even a friend to you
Its always been that way with you - your always surrounded -
you have your love and I have my friends.

Its not like I need reassuring
I am assured that your not worth my time
But I can't help but feel
Sadness is all I am when your around

You don't treat me like you once did
Just someone who deserves to be ignored
Hey lets talk about it here, I never said what I should have to you
I left my feelings out
and you proceeded to trample all over them

Hey I don't need this
You - you used to make me want to die
I'm not welcome anymore
because you led me on
you hurt me
But i know better now

I almost feel sorry for her
what she has - she could do better
But if you were to leave her
I still wouldn't go for you
cos all i feel is sadness
everytime your around.

You like? That's it. I should do something with it. I kinda like that one. That song was written at a time when i was so sad and depressed with myself. I just felt so lonely and sad. And sad for someone, because you know what they say "You don't know what you've got till its gone" and I hope..he feels that way right now.

OK..top 5ive songs for the moement:
5. Beyonce - Work it out *cause this damn song gets played a 100 times a day*
4. Faith evans, feat. missy E & freeway? - Burnin' up *damn cool*
3. No doubt - Underneath it all *in my head*
2. Audiovent - Numb
1. Phantom Planet - HEY NOW GIRL
pootie tangin' by 702 is a mad song also.

Top 5 music videos
5. Missy E - One minute man
4. Britney - Boys n.e.r.d remix
3. Paul Oakenfield - Starry eyed surprise*Fluff*
2. Phantom Planet - California
1. Weezer - keep fishin' *MUPPETS RULE!*

*MUAH*

Loving you like i never have before
needing you just to open up the door
begging you might somehow turn the tides
and tell me too, i gotta get this off my mind
I never thought id be speaking these words
i never thought i need to say
another day lonely is more than i can take
Won't you save me
Savings what i need
I just wanna be by your side
won't you save me
i don't wanna be
just drifting through the sea of life

won't you
listen please
baby don't walk out that door
I'm on my knees
your all i'm living for
I never thought I'd be speaking these words
heaven thought I'd find a way
Another day lonley is more than i can take

Won't you save me
Savings what i need
I just wanna be by your side
won't you save me
i don't wanna be
just drifting through the sea of life

suddenly the sky is falling
could it be too late for me
well if i never said i'm sorry
then i'm wrong, yes i'm wrong
then i hear my spirit calling
wondering if your longing for me
then i know that i can't live without her/him

Won't you save me
Savings what i need
I just wanna be by your side
won't you save me
i don't wanna be
just drifting through the sea of life

won't you save me...won't you save me..

Save me - hanson

funny how life deals you out the good and the bad. the stupid mistakes we make, the regrets we have to suffer and live with.
I've realised that i'm not proud of some of the things i've said or done in the past. But i don't regret it all. No, i regret very little. But i am regretting my past decisions right now. That maybe things would of been different if i did things my way, if i didn't listen to other people, if i just did what i wanted to do in the first place and not hesitate in my decision making.
Life sucks. Its true. Its a shitty excuse for it all..and i'm sure i could go on and write 500 words on exactly why it sucks, but that would probably not even justify it in my mind. It wouldn't be enough just to write why it sucks, because to me..it is more emotion based..if anyone can get my drift.
I wish i was a lot of things that i'm not. I guess that's regretting too. wishing you had other qualities than the ones who were given when u formed your personality. I guess i shouldn't beat myself up over it. I am who I am. theres no changing that, just improving the way i live and behave around others.
I don't know where i went wrong. I've tried to map it out in my mind, where my confidence failed me. Over the years, i can see how i used to be, and how i am now.
I am too trusting of some people. I will share everything about myself if someone will let me. But even with those who know me best, don;t realise that behind the sarcastic comments, the is a real seriousness behind it all. I mean almost every word i say. I am honest, too honest. And sometimes i don't realise the harshness of my comments till much later.
Basically, to get the the point of all this scatty rambling, is..i regret it. I regret the decision i made - which has effected my whole life and completely changed my goals and direction in life. I used to feel like i knew what i was doing, i felt safe knowing my future. Now i can't see whats gonna happen in the future, i can't see myself doing what i used to think i wanted.
Life sucks.

In My Place - Coldplay
In my place
In my place
Were lines that I couldn't change
I was lost, oh yeah

I was lost
I was lost
Crossed lines I shouldn't have crossed
I was lost, oh yeah

Yeah, how long must you wait for it?
Yeah, how long must you pay for it?
Yeah, how long must you wait for it?

I was scared
I was scared
Tired and underprepared
But I wait for it

If you go
If you go
Leave me down here on my own
And I wait for you

Yeah, how long must you wait for it?
Yeah, how long must you pay for it?
Yeah, how long must you wait for it?

Please, please, please
Come back and sing to me, to me, me
Come on and sing it out, out, out
Come on and sing it out to me, yeah
Come back and sing it

In my place
In my place
Were lines that I couldn't change
And I was lost, oh yeah
Oh yeah

Spin - Lifehouse
Why would I chase your shadow all my life
And be afraid of my own?
I'd rather be with you
I'd rather not know
Where I'll be than be alone and convinced that I know

When the world keeps spinning around
My world's upside down and I wouldn't change a thing
I've got nothing else to lose
I lost it all when I found you and I wouldn't change thing
No, you and I wouldn't change a thing

Everything I know has let me down
So I will just let go
Let you turn me inside out
'Cause I know I'm not sure
About anything but you wouldn't have it any other way

When the world keeps spinning around
My world's upside down and I wouldn't change a thing
I've got nothing else to lose
I lost it all when I found you and I wouldn't change thing
No, you and I wouldn't change a thing

Spinning
Turning
Watching
Burning
All my life has found it's meaning
Walking
Crawling
Climbing
Falling
All my life has found it's meaning

You and I wouldn't change a thing
No, you and I wouldn't change a thing

When the world keeps spinning around
My world's upside down and I wouldn't change a thing
I've got nothing else to lose
I lost it all when I found you and I wouldn't change thing
No, you and I wouldn't change a thing
No, you and I wouldn't change a thing

American Girls - Counting Crows
She comes out on Fridays every time
Stands out in a line
I could have been anyone she'd seen
She waits another week to fall apart
She couldn’t make another day
I wish it was anyone but me
I could have been anyone you see
She had something breakable just under her skin

American girls are weather and noise
Playing the changes for all of the boys
Holding a candle right up to my hands
Making me feel so incredible

She comes out of closets every night
But then she locks herself away
Where she could keep everything from me
I could have been anyone you see
She’s nothing but porcelain underneath her skin

American girls are weather and noise
Playing the changes for all of the boys
Holding a candle right up to my hand
Making me feel so incredible

Little shiver shaking me everyday
But I could get this same thing anywhere
So if she goes away
Well, it's alright and I'm ok
Hey, she said come back again tonight
And I said, I might, I might, I might
She said, well that's alright
If it's alright, it's alright with you
If it's alright, if it's alright with me

I waited for an hour last Friday night
She never came around
She took almost everything from me
I’m going through my closets
Trying on her clothes, almost everyday
I could have been anyone you see
I wish it was anyone but me
Nothing but pills and ashes under my skin

American girls, oh
American girls
American girls
Oh, oh, oh, oh

American girls, oh
American girls
American girls
Oh, oh, oh, oh

You made me cry
You made me cry
You made me cry
Yeah, you made me cry
You made me cry
Hey, Miss American Girl
Oh, oh, oh, yeah

Running Away - Hoobastank
I don't want you to give it all up
And leave your own life collecting dust
And I don't want you to feel sorry for me
You never gave us a chance to be
And I don't need you to be by my side
To tell me that everything's alright
I just wanted you to tell me the truth
You know I'd do that for you

So why are you running away?
Why are you running away?

'Cause I did enough to show you
That I was willing to give and sacrifice
And I was the one who was lifting you up
When you thought your life had had enough
And when I get close you turn away
There's nothing that I can do or say
So now I need you to tell me the truth
You know I'd do that for you

So why are you running away?
Why are you running away?

Is it me?
Is it you?
Nothing that I can do
To make you change your mind
Is it me?
Is it you?
Nothing that I can do
Is it a waste of time?

Is it me?
Is it you?
Nothing that I can do
To make you change your mind, no

So why are you running away?
Why are you running away?
(What is it I have to say?)
Why are you running away?
(To make you admit you're afraid?)
Why are you running away?

Beautiful Addiction
AudioVent
Change the bag
This IV's draining
And I'm afraid
I need another taste to keep me high
Inebriated
Broken, jaded
Still I need more of you inside
The pain you deal just kills me better
The pain is all that keeps me alive

You don't need your words
To sound like this
I am the hell that saved you
Now, all of your time
Is wasted through
I am the hell that saved you

Maybe it's manipulation
Who's to say?
And maybe I'm a fool
But it's my life
I hate to love to love to hate you
But there's no end for me in sight
So I'll be hooked on hating you
While you continue to suck me dry

You don't need your words
To sound like this
I am the hell that saved you
Now, all of your time
Is wasted through
I am the hell that saved you

You're just too beautiful
Another fool am I
You want me on my knees
You're just to beautiful
Another fool am I
You've got me down on my knees

You don't need your words
To sound like this
I am the hell that saved you
Now, all of your time
Is wasted through
I am the hell that saved you
That saved you

I Miss You
Incubus
To see you when I wake up, is a gift I didn't think could be real
To know that you feel the same, as I do, is a Three-fold utopian dream
You do something to me
That I can't explain
So would I be out of line, If I said
I miss you.
I see your picture, I smell your skin on, the empty pillow next to mine
You have only been gone ten days, but already I am wasting away
I know I'll see you again
Whether far or soon
But I need you to know, that I care
And I miss you

Only One
Lifehouse
She's got a pretty smile
it covers up the poison that she hides
She walks around in circles in my head
waiting for a Chance to break me a chance to take me down
now i see this burden you gave me is too much to
Carry too much to bury inside
I guess you're the only one that nobody changes
I guess you're the only one left standing when everything else goes down
You're still the only one, you're still the only one

It's all shallow and all so appealing
I'm up to my ankles and i'm drowning
Anyway in a sea of sarcastic faces familiar places where everything looks
Quite the same here it's all confusingly amusing bitter and tainted
The picture you painted to me
I guess you're the only one that nobody changes
I guess you're the only one left standing when everything else goes down
you're still the only one
Who will never change faces
I guess you're the only one left standing
When everything else goes down

Just 'cause it's all in your head
Doesn't mean it has to be in mine don't believe what you said
still can't get it out of my mind
I've tried to find myself in approval
I've already been there already done that it got me nowhere
It brought me nothing but a good place to hide in no one to confide in now
I guess you're the only one that nobody changes
I guess you're the only one that will never change faces
I guess you're the only one

Here Is Gone
Goo Goo Dolls
You and I got somethin
But it's all and then it's nuthin to me, yeah
And I got my defenses
When it comes through your intentions for me, yeah
And we wake up in the breakdown
With the things we never thought we could be, yeah

I'm not the one who broke you
I'm not the one you should fear
We got to move you darlin
I thought I lost you somewhere
But you were never really ever there at all

And I want to get free
Talk to me
I can feel you falling
And I wanted to be
All you need
Somehow here is gone

I am no solution
To the sound of this pollution in me, yeah
And I was not the answer
So forget you ever thought it was me, yeah

I'm not the one who broke you
I'm not the one you should fear
We got to move you darlin
I thought I lost you somewhere
But you were never really ever there at all

And I want to get free
Talk to me
I can feel you falling
And I wanted to be
All you need
Somehow here is gone

And I dont need the fallout
Of all the past that's in between us
And I'm not holding on
And all your lies weren't enough to keep me here

And I want to get free
Talk to me
I can feel you falling
And I wanted to be
All you need
Somehow here is gone

And I want to get free
Talk to me
I can feel you falling

I know it's out there
I know it's out there
And I can feel you falling

I know it's out there
I know it's out there
Somehow here is gone, yeah

Paradise
Vanessa Carlton
once upon a year gone by
she saw herself give in
every time she closed her eyes
she saw what could have been
well nothing hurts and nothing bleeds
when covers tucked in tight
funny when the bottom drops
how she forgets to fight... to fight

and it's one more day in paradise
one more day in paradise

as darkness quickly steals the light
that shined within her eyes
she slowly swallows all her fear
and soothes her mind with lies
well all she wants and all she needs
are reasons to survive
a day in which the sun will take
her artificial light... her light

and it's one more day in paradise
one more day in paradise
it's one more day in paradise
one last chance to feel alright... alright

don't pretend to hold it in just let it out
don't pretend to hold it in just push it out
don't you try to hold it in just let it out and
don't you try to hold it in you hold it in

[chorus]

once upon a year gone by
she saw herself give in
every time she closed her eyes
she saw what could have been

Catapult
Counting Crows
All of the sudden she disappears
just yesterday she was here
somebody tell me if I am sleeping
someone should be with me here
(cause I don't wanna be alone)

I wanna be the knife that cuts into my hand
and I wanna be scattered from here in this catapult
What a big baby won't somebody save me please
You won't find nobody home

all of these quiet battered voices
wait for the hunger to come
we got little revolvers and stupid choices
and no one to say when we're done
(Well I don't wanna bring you down)

I wanna be the light that burns out your eyes
`cause I know there's little things about me
that would sing in the silence of so much rejection
in every connection I make
I can't find nobody home
I wanna be the last thing you hear when you're falling asleep....

STANDING ON THE EDGE

I'm not asking for much
But I need a little time to try
What it is I want
And is it you this time

I wish that I knew you better
I wish that I knew know myself
I wanted to be forever
But now I see it’s only me

Standing on the edge of the world
Now I don’t want you to catch me
I want you to let me
Stand up here and walk on my own
I can’t learn to love you
If you’re all I know

Saw you waiting there
Across the parking lot
I told you, you never been so cold
You were looking for
All the things you know I’m not
And believe me I’ve tried
I’ve tried, oooh

I thought that I knew you better
Than I knew myself

Standing on the edge of the world
Now I don’t want you to catch me
I want you to let me
Stand up here and walk on my own
I can’t learn to love you
If you’re all I know

Uh-oh, uh-oh
Don’t let it change your mind
Whoa-oh, uh-oh
On and on and on and on....

Standing on the edge of the world
Now I don’t want you to catch me
I want you to let me
Stand up here and walk on my own
I can’t learn to love you
I can’t learn to love you
I can’t learn to love you
If you’re all I know

(Michelle Branch)

MY ASS IS NUMB.

It is so freezing outside. I was waiting to come inside for like 15 minutes - at la trobe, in front of the library there are heaps of tables and shit...all metal stools to sit on. So my ass is numb and my nose is numb cos its so fricken cold. arghh! i'm sure the feeling will return to my ass very soon. hehe. So how are all you fine people this cold and frosty morning?! Did anyone see phantom planet on rove last nite? I taped it :)
Ahh, i have anthropology today. I'm gonna buy a can of coke later though, b4 the lecture, cos i need caffine to keep me awake in the two hour lecture. Because anthropology is just so interesting, i want to be awake for it. lol.

Hotmail is a bitch. It keeps telling me the server is too busy. It won't let me delete all my junk mail. grr. But it would be nice if someone sent me some normal e-mail once in awhile. I only get chain stoopid letters and the occasional news update from the hive.
SEND ME AN E-MAIL evesygal@hotmail.com - no junk, just the good stuff.

I like libraries. not to sound nerdy, but i've always liked them. Maybe because its quiet and everything in a library is free. lol. Maybe it's just all the books and the magazines, like all the mags from the pines library i've ripped up for posters. their just relaxed places. I did get an offer once to train as a new tech librarian or sumthing like that. Because primary schools need staff skilled in infomation technology, and i fit the job description. nah, libraries are great to run a muck in. Cos you can run a muck quietly, and not get kicked out. LOL. like..change all the numbers on the aisle so that when ppl go to find a book, they end up in the wrong aisle. Or put viruses on all the computers, except one. Or follow ppl around the lib, and when u see them reaching for a certain book, beat them to it and borrow it out just to piss them off. Go to the reserve section and mix up all the file boxes, and move the only copies of the cinema studies book to another shelf. See..running a muck, quietly. It can be done!

hmm..its 9am. one hour till anth. I'm debating over wether i should bother coming to uni tomorrow. I only have one class, it'll seem like a waste to come in for it since it's only linguistics. But of course, the thursday uni market is on. And there's always this guy there with good cds, cheapish too. I'm always looking for a bargain cd. i've just ran out of things to say...

I was stained with a role in a day on my own
and as you walked into my life you showed what needed to be shown
but i always knew what was right
i just didn't know that i might peel away and ....
and i will never see the sky the same way again
and i will learn to say goodbye to yesterday and I
will never cease to fly...
i will always reach too high cos i've seen twilight
~ * * * ~
Well let me tell you I have seen a monster age of seventeen
Who'll let you in to kick you out and knows what love is "all about"
Hey now girl I see you walking by
And long ago you used to stop and talk now you just wink your eye
and I'm surprised you look all grown up
A champagne glass next to a paper cup
I stopped you just to say it
Hey now girl
Her tongue is black haven't you heard her mutter those three dirty words
For all those foolish boys to hear like a siren bringing ships so near
Hey now girl I see you walking by
And I remember how you used to smile or how hard you used to try
It's in your eyes and I'm in a trance
A winter chill next to a spring romance
I stopped you just to say it
Hey now girl

*MUAH*

time: 11:30 am monday morning
mood: hmm. dunno. But pissed off with record companies for spreading these shit copies of artist songs on the net!
listen: the vines 'get free' & incubus mtv unplugged 'miss you'

Music news, avril lavigne has broken some record in the US..or sumthing like that. Apparently, her album 'let go' keeps doing so damn well that each week theres like..a rise in album sales, and she's like the youngest person that's happened to or sumthing. So must be a good album if more and more ppl are buying it. But i already knew it was a good album.
Hanson has finished recording, their mixing. they'll be done soon. They'll prolly start promo end of this year and release the album early next year. Finally.

me: fuck. monday morning. uni at 3. i have stoopid books to buy and stoopid tutorial times to go find out. grr. uni sucks. 12 more weeks of this?! Faaaaaaaaakkk
And i swear..i'm gonna burn msn. cos its such a bitch.

ARGHH!!
Time: 2:13pm sunday arvo
mood: crap but improving
listen: avril, Tomorrow

rollingstone.com has some great features on avril. and if u have cable net..make sure u watch the videos cos its all good. Unfortunately my dial-up net connection is shithouse, so when i watch the avril videos it keeps rebuffering every 30 seconds.

I have been sick for the past few days. Since wednesday. I predicted that I would be worse by the weekend, but actually, i got sick wednesday - and it hit me like a bus. Amd wednesday was..freezing that night. Lucky me got to wait for almost 40 minutes for my dad to pick me up from heidelberg, so i was sick with a high temp, and freezing my ass off. My highest temp so far now, is 39.0 - go me! i didn't even feel that bad. And I was sick just b4 the semester exams..so.hopefully this won't be a reocurring thing.

Anyhoo..me hungry...bye byesss *MUAH* -oops..sorri..i'm sick. I don't wanna pass the germs. hehe. snoogens.

howdy partners!

I got 80% dateable on the new test at thespark.com
Hmm..if that's so..then howcome i can't get a guy? lol.

I don't have much to contribute today. I have a lecture in half an hour..and a four hour break after that. Thank god i brought a book with me...otherwise i'd be bored out of my brains for the whole day. And I don't finish till 6pm. It sucks to be me.
Oh..and i've decided to get creative with my webpage. Its gonna look..a little different. Ok..not that different, just..sailormoon different. Funny though..i didn't even finish the last layout. Nah..this time its gonna be flashy! It'll be flambouant! It will be glam and rock! It will have FRAMES! wow. my talent..my skill. And i'm sure that one day i'll learn html. But in the next few months..There will probably be a few more site changes..just cos..it gets boring afterawhile. and i'm thinking of starting another blog. But a group blog. So if anyone is interested in that idea..buzz me. evesygal@yahoo.com or the hotmail addy. I dun care. I just don't want shit in my inbox.

I should get off this computer..i've used it for an hour already. damn time limits.

anyhoo. BUFFY FINALE last nite. Season final..not series final. Do not confuse the two. Well..they say there's so far one last season of buffy left. But..the creator of the show..joss whedon..has hinted, that it could go on without buffy. Maybe there is a future for Dawn slaying vampires? who knows. But i know that whateva that guy writes..it'll be good.
I should go check my tutorial time for today. might do that now since i have some spare time.

I'll check ya'all later! woohoo.
*MUAH*