I don't usually post messages on message boards. I just...don't seem to get into it because the conversation is either really boring or doesn't apply to me. And I haven't been a fan of the Hanson message boards either. I am always the antisocial member of a yahoo club. I just join them cos people ask me to and not that i don't like recieving those long newsletters in my e-mail, I just don't particpate much. I've never been one to be actively involved in anything...not that i'm lazy I just don't find myself interested in doing that. As Ms. Duncan put it last year, I like to sit back and watch things go on around me.

Well yesterday Tracey (online buddy) asked/ordered me to post in her yahoo club. Cos her club had been pretty quiet for some time. Well i was kinda like...nahhh..not in the mood. But i posted something anyway. Now, my side of it before you read it - you need to understand the mood I was in. I was missing out on Charmed to be on the net - and i was hungry as a hippo - I had been having cravings all day (No I am not pregnant!) and i was grouchy.. Now what I wrote wasn't meant to be taken seriously at all - I was gonna write "IGNORE THIS MESSAGE" for the subject title..but i thought Bitchin was more appropriate.
Well here it is for you :
hello....so...nothing much is happening in the world of Hanson..well unless u consider the fact that they are "supposedly" recording another album...but do they seriously expect us to believe that? It doesn't take that long! Some bands take two weeks to record whole albums. And with all the music technology these days you don't have to spend months and months recording!
If u ask me..(which u didn't but i'm gonna tell u anyway) they are all just sitting on their cute lazy lil butts thinking "Oh..the fans are loyal..they won't stray after waiting this long!" HA! Boys..don't even think of coming back to Australia...cos they've already forgotten u there :P

OK..i know it was mean. It was 'Evelyn sarcastic bitch mean.' I was bitchin about my fave band just cos i could. OK...maybe I wanted to take out my fustration on Hanson (A museli bar was tormenting me on the desk in front of me). I just wanted to spark a reaction from other club members...See what other people thought...spark a conversation.
Now this was the reply I got...

alright first off you lazy, lifeless, beast of burden... They arent lazy they are being professional. It may take other bands two weeks to record their albums, but Hanson is taking their time in doing this so that they can get it right. You should'nt call youself a real fan if you keep bashing them like this. They are taking so much time to please the fans...of course your not being that thankful. You're acting like you own them you self-centered bitch. I usually don't reply to these messages but you need to get it right.
Tasha

I was thinking of writing something really mean back with alot of Fucks and Shit in my reply..but i thought against it.
I like how she says "IF you keep bashing them like this" If she must know..it was the first ever time I've actually bashed them on a public forum. OK..hehe..this one's a winner "They are taking so much time to please the fans...of course your not being that thankful"
Hey...does anyone remember the last time Hanson pleased their fans in Australia?....well..dang I must have missed it.
"I usually don't reply to these messages" - Ya know..she should have just ignored my message..cos now she's got me hurt by the "self-fish bitch" line.

I thought the Internet was about expressing your opinions? And considering that was the first time I ever wrote more than four words in a message board..I don't think i'm gonna do it again. These Americans are too aggressive for my liking.

'I must not fear. Fear is the mind killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.'

That is the Bene Gesserit "response from the Litany against fear." It is from the fantastic book Dune - which I am a big fan of.
Now i know its like Sci-Fi...But itz not like "And the Captain of the star ship cruiser fought the devilish demons from outer space" Not that type of crap. Nooo. These books are based more on politics than that trekkie type of shit.
It's a complex story with lots of characters..in fact there are so many its hard to keep track. So there are so many other sub-story lines inter-woven in the story.
I love the books, well i've only read so far the 3 prequel books which do help give more insight into the already complex storylines. It just also makes it easier for the reader to better understand the characters involved.

Anyhoo. I like to think that passage above works. That something like that can calm you or have a soothing affect.
Maybe i'm being silly...but at the moment i think i have alot to be scared about.

What do I fear?
I fear old age
I fear getting fat(ter)
I fear dying
I fear that i might have hives...or some unknown disease that hasn't been detected yet..lol.
but i don't think i do.
I fear that i will be forever lonely
I fear love
I fear the future
I fear my past
I fear the unknown
I fear what I will become
I fear that i'll never be truely happy
I fear Fear itself, that the thought of fear..is enough to make me fearFUL.