Are you listening?

if only - hanson
in my head - Queens of the stone age
maybe - N.E.R.D
Killing me - L' Arc en ciel
Azoura - Shiina Ringo

I've been thinking alot. I've been feeling like crap because of some things a friend said. My relationship is different not because there isn't communication, not because we don't feel the need to talk about sex, sex and sex - just because i won't rush into something with someoneI've just met - doesn't make my relationship anything less than what it is now. It's fantastic now. I think distance does make the heart alittle fonder. I think i've come back from my two weeks refreshed - smarter - i know whats good for me now and what's not - I know where I want to be in 6 months time, I know that that nothing lasts forever, but it could if i wanted it to. If i wanted to stay in the one place, be lil old dependable me...but i can't do that. And I won't become what someone expects of me...i'm sick of assumptions and this and that. I'm sick of other people's ideals when i have my own to stick to. I'm happy where i am now...but forgive me for wanting more. I'm not satisfied anymore with just the ordinary life i've been living now. And I'm sick of people rubbing my face in it ...yeah right so you got to third base with a chick you've only known two months - you say your in love...fuck that. What is love? does anyone really know? I'm angry and pissed for the way a friend is making me feel inferior...like my relationship doesn't matter cos he's found a soul mate...while i'm taking things casually and slow. Im allowed to - i have my reasons...he can go fuck a tree...wait he's already doing that. Giving me shit when he's the shit giver. Fuck him. I don't care anymore. I'm over it. Back to being happy thank you.