I have had the strangest 24 hours. I have had enough of these strange emotional ups and downs i've been having. While sober i seem fine and happy, then I get drunk and stay very high and fairly happy and then when i finally come down I'm so low that i've sunk to the deepest depths of the depression end of my emotional scale. And somehow when i woke up this morning my low was still with me. i've spent most of today as a sleepless zombie, (do zombies sleep? they are the waking dead after all) and i've been numb of anything emotionally stable and good. Even a work associate of mine (whom i don't work with that often) noticed a change in my demeanor. I wasn't rude...execpt when i knocked back the short bread biscuits that nadia made - but honestly I didn't want to work today. When i got into Miss shop this arvo i realised how stupid my day was going to be with nothing to do and no one decent to chat with (despite there being 7 girls working in that dept today). I was happy to be moved into christmas trimm dept, even though i had no idea about anything. Customers would ask me questions about the trees on display or about the crazy electrical singing santas and i would stare at them jaw open with a "oh fuck" look on my face...lol. I must admit though, speed wrapping is not my thing. even if its only tissue paper wrapping. And also i'll admit that i miss my personal care department. Yes it has its moments where it is boring and horrible, but i'd rather be there and comfortable than thrown into the deep ends into a busy department where i know nothing.

yeah anyway enough talk about work, its driving me crazy.

hyde - masquerade
dashboard confessional - screaming infidelities & For You to Notice(my anthem for the day)

Distance - Utada Hikaru (remix version)

Ki ni naru noni kikenai
Oyogitsukarete kimi made mukuchi ni naru

Aetai noni ienai nami ni osarete
Mata sukoshi tooku naru

Tokirenai you ni keep it going baby
Onaji kimochi janai nara tell me
Muri wa shinai shuugi demo
Sukoshi nara shite mite mo ii yo

I wanna be with you now
Futari de distance shijimete
Ima nara maniau kara
We can start over
Hitotsu ni wa narenai
Itsu no hi ka distance mo
Dakishimerareru you ni nareru yo
We can start sooner
Yappari I wanna be with you

Hito koto de konna ni mo kizutsuku kimi wa
Kodoku wo oshiete kureru

Mamorenai toki keep on trying, baby
Yakusoku toori janai kedo trust me
Muri wa shinai shuugi demo
Kimi to nara shite mite mo ii yo

I wanna be with you now
Futari de distance mitsumete
Ima nara maniau kara
We can start over
Kotoba de tsutaetai
I wanna be with you now
Sono uchi ni distance mo
Dakishimerareru you ni nareru yo
We should stay together
Yappari I wanna be with you

I wanna be with you now
Coz I know this can't be forever
We can start over, just you and me
I wanna be with you now
Coz I know this can't be forever
We should stay together, just you and me
I wanna be with you

-- This song just reflects my mood for today - so if you knew this song and what it sounds like, you'd know I'm very happy right now. Isn't happy such a strange word, its a very childish word to me. Yet its the only word i can think of that would perfectly describe my mood...hmm.

i've changed my tune about adsl - and while i'm not about to have one of those moments where i'll say i'd fuck the guy who invented it (past examples - the guy who invented napster or icq) but I will say FUCK I thank my lucky stars because those two episodes of naruto i have downloaded have been FUCKING AWESOME. now i bet your thinking, how many more times can evelyn slip the word FUCK into a sentence or paragraph. and you'll be pleasntly surprised when i don't finish this sentence with the F-word. lol..well almost (you'll be more surprised when the day comes that i decide to fucking proof read my blogs and get rid of all this bad speeling and crazy un-needed punctuation and grammaraaar. But it is not in my nature to proof read).

listen:
spinal tap - give me some money
utada hikaru - in my room
henry rollins - A rollins in the wry
Deepdish - flashdance (because i heard it exactly 5 times on the radio yesterday)

watch:
mean girls (cos their so meaaaaaan)
little Britain - I'm a LAAAADY! "you there, do you think i'm a laaaady?"
Naruto - ep 112 (chouji and his fat rolling jutsu)
the goodies - Kitty Kong ep.

I'm in one of those moods...i want to write something here but nothing i can think of really appeals to me. I've realised that ADSL isn't all that great because telstra sucks balls....literally honestly its been such a pain in the ass trying to just access some sites here. while the downloading of songs is usually fast - its not cool when stupid kazaa users decided they won't share their mp3s with my lovely speedy internet. hmm.

Right now. just then i had a craving for macca's fries. that really cannot be a good thing.

I think I'm becoming obsessed with lip gloss. Don't ask me why, but since trying the new rimmel jelly gloss...i think i'm hooked. meanwhile my new sugarbaby lip laquer is fantassstic - yet nothing seems to be as nice as the rimmel stuff right now.....i'll have to actually buy some gloss instead of just using the testers at work...haha. Honestly testers for lipsticks and such just become really eww and grotty after awhile. And to think ppl steal them, Eww...I wouldn't be able to live with myself if i did that, i'd just keep thinking about how many other ppl's lips have been all over that stick of lippy....eww....all the germs! testers are really not the most hygenic things to ever be thought of by cosmetic companies.
anyway...

oh goody - im now working saturday 2-7pm....damn christmas trading hours...looks like getting to james's 21st will be alot more difficult than at first thought....grr.

musiqueeee:
jojo feat bow bow - Its you

I was right. nothing happened. my night ended in a [G] rated way.

Aries Mar 21 - Apr 20

Sun December 5, 2004
The level of sexual chemistry flowing between you and you-know-who is so powerful right now that you almost feel you could reach out and touch it. This could lead to some X-rated scenes but there's also a chance that it could go another way and provoke a combustible atmosphere. So do your best to steer the situation in whichever direction you want it to take.

Your lucky numbers are: 18,22

Your lucky colours are: teal blue,apricot

Sexual chemistry...ooh X-rated scenes... Combustible atmosphere? Bring it on msn astrosurf...Bring it on. but somehow i doubt my day shall end in an x-rated way.