I am an idiot.

Firstly....JMC academy sends me a letter telling me to arrange an appointment time for an interview.

Then i decide over the phone without putting any serious thought into my decision, that i didn't want to do the contemporary music course anymore, just the music business.
I totally chickened out! Just cos i didn't want to do an audition! and i'm afarid to call them back and say i do want to..but i got scared at the thought of performing. I totally suck!
I mean..i could have a career..I mean, i know i'm not the greatest singer - but at least i'd have a shot at doing something with my voice, and now i've just screwed it over. I mean, i guess i can always do the course later on - but i think i'm regretting my 10 second decision and it is now kicking me in the ass. Did i just seem to forget that...performing - is something i want to do - I remember watching people performing and thinking to myself "That's what i want to be doing!" And i've just let another opportunity go.
Geez..well i have an exam to study for.

And that's it...I'M CHANGING THE NAME OF THIS STOOPID BLOG!