Low - Kelly Clarkson

Everybody's talking
But they don?t say a thing
They look at me with sad eyes
But I don't want the sympathy
Its cool you didn't want me
Sometimes you can't go back
Buy why'd you have to go and make a mess like that
Well I just have to say
Before I let go

Have you ever been low?
Have you ever had a friend that let you down so?
When the truth came out
Were you the last to know?
Were you left out in the cold?
What you did was low

No I don't need your number
There's nothing left to say
Except I never thought it'd hurt this much to be sane
My friends are outside waiting
I've gotta go

Have you ever been low?
Have you ever had a friend that let you down so?
When the truth came out
Were you the last to know?
Were you left out in the cold?
What you did was low
What you did was low (low)
What you did was low (low)
What you did was low (low)

I walk out of this darkness
With no sense of regret
And I go with a clear conscience
We both know that you can't say that
Here's to show
For all the time I loved you so
So

Have you ever been low?
Have you ever had a friend that let you down so?
When the truth came out
Were you the last to know?
Were you left out in the cold?
What you did was low
Have you ever been low?
Have you ever had a friend that let you down so?
When the truth came out
Were you the last to know?
Were you left out in the cold?
What you did was low
Have you ever been low?
Have you ever had a friend that let you down so?
Cause what you did was low

I really really like this song. And somehow in my current state it fits. I think i made progress today, i finally came to terms with some stuff that i've been dealing with of late, and i've realise that saying i don't care about things and people is a crock of shit. I care all too much, and thats my problem. I worry, I cry over things that keep me awake at night. I can't sleep when something is on my mind, when something troubles me, when someone hurts me or offends me. I don't understand some people, and I guess i never will. I want to accept people for who they are, and i forget about the shit they've done, but how can u be friends with someone who isn't even a friend back. How can you care about a friend when they don't even have the decentcy to call you or write u an e-mail or let you know something, or trust you..or even tell you that they don't want to be friends with you.
Now, i'm not perfect. Trust me, i'll be the first to admit it. I hate my flaws, my imperfections everything about myself i want to change - i want to change myself my personality, everything, but i'm still learning things and the hard way. I throw myself into the deep end and try to swim. My whole life i've been stuck in situations, difficult situations that i couldn't escape only try to make the best of, my life isn't some comfy holiday, its hard - but i'm learning to appreciate it. And i appreciate every single person in my life, everyone i've ever known has affected me in some way. And i'm glad to say i've even learnt from my mistakes, and from other people - because i've seen how they treat people and i don't want to be like that.

I've done this stupid ranty shit so many times on my blog. I have to keep reassuring myself, that i'm not bad, that i'm not totally hopeless, that one day it will all be worth it. lol.

I wrote a short story last week, its about a boring married couple, who one day crack and try to break their routine lives. I kinda like it, but i needs work.

Anyway..i have a research report to begin.

Playlist:
Buried Myself Alive - The Used
Cute without the E - Taking Back Sunday
Asking Too Much - Ani Difranco
Beautiful - Me'shell Ndegeocello